Boyfriends #1 and #2 may have overlapped a little if I am being honest.. BF#2 lasted longer, just short of 3 years and we were obsessed with each other.
My Angel by Mr.Capone-E ft. MC Magic
First, let’s talk more about meeting our boyfriends out and about as strangers!
There were a few spots Jr. High me would roam on weekends. The mall was a big one, but they closed early so we found a few other options. “Cosmic” mini-golf and bowling were blacklight versions of themselves and meant we could be out past 11:00pm but only happened on special occasions.
However, the movie theaters had late shows every day and they quickly became our go to for late evenings.
BF#2 and I met at the movie theater. We exchanged phone numbers and that was the beginning of the end. We were on the fast track to puppy love.
This relationship felt more real than the last. We did more then just movie dates every weekend and walking around the mall. We actually hung out with each others families, went on camping trips, had enough trust for long nights alone, we were together every waking moment. Our lives were quickly enmeshed and our families didn’t seem to mind.
I never met any of his friends but he knew mine and we were all close. He became a friend to my friends and it made me feel so secure. Most importantly he got along with my bestie, we will call her Shelby. He was the “big brother” she needed for advice. I was so happy that we were all a team.
Our relationship felt like a dream.
BF#2 and I were 14 when he “proposed”. For those of you wondering, 14 years old puts us in our freshman year of high school. It was wild. As a 14-year-old I was on the moon. As an adult, I see how inappropriate it was.
The ring was a beautiful titanium band with a free-floating diamond. There was something engraved on the inside, but I can’t remember what it said. (pictured on the left: the only photo I have of the ring with the cat he gave me the same year.)
I am sure you are wondering, how in the heck did a 14-year-old afford a diamond ring?
My family was also wondering. My sister specifically noticed a difference in him, mainly his weight dropping exponentially. There was a clear change in their eyes.
I can’t remember if he told me on his own or if I started to pry, but eventually, he came clean about his sudden change. He had been doing crystal meth with his older cousin to stay up and work on cars. To afford those gifts, that ring. Knowing this terrified me. I thought he was going to school and learning a new skill at night – I had been so proud.
My family has always been an open conversation household. If we had questions, my parents and grandparents would tell us the truth. I was told that addiction wouldn’t go away overnight, it was going to be a long road, and I was not prepared for that. I became well aware of the hold drugs could have over a person, specifically his drug of choice. BF#2 fell from the pedestal I put him on.
I needed to talk to Shelby about it, she knew us both and I knew she would understand.
I explained everything I knew about addiction from my family, everything him and I had talked about. I had my mind made up for the most part but I needed support, someone to help me stay accountable. She didn’t agree with me walking away, she saw the good I did and helped talk me into staying.
I tried and tried to stay in the relationship but it was declining quickly. I couldn’t trust him and he was a pretty unapologetic addict. He was happy with his weight loss and being able to get his own money. For some reason, Shelby couldn’t see how bad it was. The only thing I received from her at this point was guilt. I couldn’t talk to her about it anymore, I could trust her anymore.
As I opened up to my other friends about the situation, I got the encouragement I needed. I tried, and tried, to break things off easily, I even gave him back the ring to officially end things but in the end, my only option was to stop responding.
After we broke up, I discovered him and Shelby started talking. I should have known why she was hyping him up so much, she was starting to fall in love with him. I totally got the allure but she ruined her relationship with me for a person who was too in love with himself to care. His addiction was running the show and as much as I felt bad for her, I was more angry than anything.
Boyfriend #1 was a gangster, Boyfriend #2 was an addict, wait until you hear about Boyfriend #3. (FACEPALM).